Every once in a while there comes along a movie that is so bad that you are gonna die laughing. Never thought aap ka suroor could be beaten but after watching Bewafai I can safely say there never could be a worse one. I have a nasty stomach ache after that but here's the story in a nutshell. Trust me if you can watch it you would wanna. There are few movies that can make you laugh as bad as this one.
I started watching it somewhere in the middle where Padmini Kolhapuri has just come back to sanity. Rajesh Khanna and Tina Munim are in the middle of a love story. Tina's dad Pran who is also Rajesh Khanna's boss obviously doesn't like this so he does the obvious: send 3 lackeys to kill him. But then 3 lackeys with a machine gun are of course no match for the superstar with 2 heroines. So what does our good old villain do: hire the biggest badass killer there is bigger than even Sunny Deol, the one and only "Rajnikant"(sound effect: taddaaan!!!).
Rajni's of course got the super killer style. He won't use the conventional guns, knives, tigers or poison, so what does he use: a remote controlled automatic gun which is fired using a time bomb. He certainly cannot miss but the hero too cannot die, so Rajesh Khanna ends up with a bullet in the head and occasional headaches and blindness and impending death as marked in the calender after exactly 12 months(after effects of "Anand"). His clues to the murderer, Rajni's calling card, a toy gramophone which sings some "eyes" song. Padmini Kolhapuri runs back to Rajesh's parents so that they can come to a different city and sign a few documents for the hospital but by then our awesome killer has decapitated the dad and given a gentle push off the top floor to the mom. The same mom who predicts the future way better than any economist predicts the stock market(even better than my barber predicting the weather) but well guess she wasn't paid enough to put up more of a fight.
Now you would think watching a loved one shot in the head and his parents dead would send an ex-nutcase back over the brink but no... She goes insane only when Rajesh Khanna shouts at her. Tina is conveniently away with Pran somewhere. Meanwhile another lady enters in(Meenakshi somefink) to romance the lead guy so he can dump his lady love(he's not got much time left between the long monologues) who also wants revenge on the main villain and also hires our big killer. He promptly demonstrates how to send her pet dog into complete paralysis except the eyes with a needle. Padmini gets back from a boating trip after watching Rajni and Tina romancing. Which doc takes a mad patient for a boat-ride is beyond me. So she runs back to report.
So finally everyone there is meets up at a party, Padmini realizes Pran raped her (I am still to find a movie of hers where she did not get raped). Rajesh and pran fight, Rajni secretly does his Kung-fu panda style needle nerve technique(should be called Rajni's techniqe(TM) but then it is super secret and people know only the more mortal panda) and Pran's mostly toast. Rajesh proves Rajni's the killer(how?? fingerprints on the gramophone of course) and a chase sequence where Rajesh due to his occasional blindness or terrible driving killing half the public on the road, destroying all the property there is follows Rajni on a bike.
They take the free for all fencing match back to Rajni's uber cool, world famous, secret hideout which has attack birds and state of the art laboratories among other things. Just as Rajesh gets distracted by Padmini and stabbed, she reveals she is Rajni's sister. Guess the shocks in between cured her. So now these 3 sit down and talk about their lives until then for half an hour when the superstar realizes Rajesh is dying. So after some more casual informal verbal exchanges, he reveals he is also a surgeon with a special offer: A bullet removal free with every sword cut treated. The cops come along at their leisurely pace and shoot Padmini(one for each of her corny one-liners) and Rajni who is done with the surgery, one stitch per bullet that hits him. Rajesh is just glad he doesn't have to pay the bill.
Finally the movie ends with Tina and Rajesh getting together singing songs on a helicopter and a boat and life's good again as the 3rd heroine is pretty bored of Rajesh after the few dates or multiple night stands that she had with him. Finally about the music; The songs in this movie are positively priceless, I wouldn't listen to the album no matter how much you paid me.
